I lost my motivation.
I dunno where it is.
i've stopped looking for it.
I have so much homework that its overwhelming me so i decided to "write it out"; my way of coping with stress, AND an added bonus, yet another way of procrastinating. I have a 20 minute presentation, a 15-20 page paper, 3-5 page paper, 4-6 page paper ALL due either tomorrow or tuesday. what are these teachers thinking?? I still need to pick up my cap and gown, which i keep forgetting about because i have so much other stuff done. I sent out my graduation invites finally, and when i say "I sent them out" i mean "Mom sent them out". i didn't have time to even remember them. Things keep popping up to remind me that i'm graduating, like the link the school sent me to check my name on the program for the graduation ceremony. that made me cry. just seeing my name on the graduation program under the college of education was a reality check. it caught me off guard. I was listening to the Dixie Chicks the other day (FLASHBACK!) and the song Wide Open Spaces came on and i got overwhelmed about life after graduation, and moving on, new places, and i cried AGAIN. i need to graduate soon before i have a panic attack.
I'm sure i'll be fine, and i'll succeed in life, but i'm just focused on getting through these next 2 weeks. God has a plan and i need to stop stressing over it, because nothing that catches me off guard is anything that God didnt see coming. He isnt surprised by the ups and downs of life because he WROTE my life story a long time ago.
Today is Easter Sunday and I feel sorta numb to everything going on around me. Even in church this morning i was distracted by all that life is about to throw my way, and it almost made me mad at myself because i couldnt get my thoughts to turn off worldly concerns, and just focus on JESUS RISING FROM THE DEAD! thats what Easter celebration is about! a feat that no human could do; only a Godly human could rise from the dead, saving the world, THE WHOLE WORLD, from their sins.
Good day though, spending time with family and Riley Bug. I wish i could put up a picture of him, he is so funny, but his mom and dad are crazy about him not having pictures on the internet. kinda ridiculous. anyway, hope everyone had a blessed holiday celebrating the rising of Jesus!
Love you all!
